At a time when parents are overwhelmed, adolescents are under increasing pressure, and family relationships are often swept along by the pace of everyday life, mindfulness seems more necessary than ever. This is the perspective shared by Martina Trontelj Petrič — a psychologist, career counselor, and mindfulness counselor for parents and adolescents, who combines professional expertise, warmth, and deep respect for every family that enters her space. After gaining experience within the school system and through numerous individual counseling sessions, Martina developed a unique approach: one based on questions, relationships, and genuine presence. As she herself says, questions are not merely her tool, but the fundamental path to understanding — both for herself and for the people she helps.
An approach that builds trust
When Martina describes her way of working, she first mentions something that is often lacking today: safety and equality in relationships. “It’s very important to me that the person feels safe and knows they can refuse a question or technique at any time. I don’t want to be an authority figure leading the way, but rather a partner in co-creating solutions.”
In her work, Martina does not stand in front of a person, but beside them. Her first task is listening — attentive, nonjudgmental, and exploratory listening. Yet it is not only words that matter, but the entire story, tone, gaze, pauses, and the atmosphere itself. These subtle details often lead to deeper understanding. She recalls the example of a woman who came to her feeling she had “a huge problem.” During one hour of exploration, she arrived at an unexpected realization — that the challenge was actually an opportunity to finally devote herself to an activity she enjoyed but had long denied herself. Such a shift in perspective, from problem to recognized opportunity, may have emerged precisely because of this patient, mindful exploration grounded in a safe relationship between client and psychologist.
Mindfulness: a presence that transforms relationships
Although Martina combines various psychological approaches — from humanistic methods to elements of positive psychology — mindfulness is the thread connecting them all.
According to Martina, mindfulness means consciously directing attention where we ourselves choose, while remaining fully present in the here and now.
“When we direct our attention to what is happening in the present moment, whether within ourselves or in our surroundings, that alone brings us into contact with the present. A key part of this is also accepting everything we notice exactly as it is — without judgment, criticism, or the need to change anything.”
When she applies these principles to parenting, they become strikingly practical. Martina offers parents the following guidelines for practicing mindfulness in their relationship with adolescents:
when your child comes home from school, truly listen
put your phone away and devote a few minutes entirely to them
don’t rush to give advice, interrupt, or correct the adolescent’s behavior
simply be with them — curiously and openly
This is what adolescents need most. Not a perfect parent, but a present parent.
How does mindfulness help during the teenage years?
Martina knows the challenges of modern families well, as she herself is also a mother of teenagers. The biggest mistake she notices among parents, she describes very honestly — and very humanly:
“We react from strong emotions. We don’t take a minute to check what’s happening within us, but immediately move into criticism, conditions, and threats. At that point, the adolescent shuts down, and we’ve turned one problem into two.” Mindfulness helps parents pause for a moment, check in with their feelings, and then approach the situation calmly. This allows for a conversation that is truly a conversation — rather than a battle.
Mindfulness for stressed parents
Martina often recommends short, simple exercises that parents can do anywhere:
a body scan — a few minutes of observing sensations in the body
a three-minute mindful break — one minute for breathing, one for the body, one for thoughts
a short walk or a moment of fresh air while reflecting on the question: “What do I need right now?”
These can all be techniques that help parents relieve stress before entering into interaction with their child.
“When a parent takes care of themselves, the entire dynamic at home changes,” the expert emphasizes.
The most important advice for parents: dedicate one-on-one time
Martina’s key advice for parents who want to strengthen their relationship with their adolescent is:
“Set aside time meant only for your child. One-on-one time is truly a game changer.” This can be a walk, watching a movie together, a short trip, or a conversation over tea. It does not matter where you go, but that you are genuinely there together. In her own family, they also hold family meetings where each member shares their wishes, opinions, and ideas. This communicates to children that their voice matters. And one more thing — it is important for families to occasionally disconnect from technology together. Only then can family members truly connect with one another, in ways that screens often obscure.
Martina Trontelj Petrič is a psychologist who combines broad professional knowledge with deep humanity. She understands parents not only professionally but also from personal experience, and she offers adolescents a safe space where they do not feel pressured by others’ expectations, nor criticized or judged. She finds particular fulfillment in career counseling for adolescents and adults, exploring their talents, interests, strengths, and personal values, helping them discover a direction they can build with motivation rather than pressure. Workshops for adolescents are an area that especially inspires her and also awaken within her a sense of curiosity and personal growth. Her work is guided by one gentle yet powerful idea:
First connection. Then change.